so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
