sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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