U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
