I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
