NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
