bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
