Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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