Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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