my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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