Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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