Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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