Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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