we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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