Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Randomize