Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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