we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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