Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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