So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
