Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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