So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
