You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
