are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
