i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
