every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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