Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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