i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
