her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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