oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
