So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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