you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
