i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
You know, be my cock's hype man.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
