i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
