im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
