Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
