where am i from again
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
