even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Randomize
