dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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