And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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