i can't believe i had my finger in that
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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