ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
