hell yes lets make some ravioli
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
