my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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