its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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