Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
