sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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