Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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