saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
