The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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