I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
wow bdsm is so cute
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