so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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